The Battle Between No-label Relationships: Dating vs Hookup Culture
Whether it be the physical touch during a hookup or a quest to meet the right one when dating, we can all agree the main reason we engage in both or either is to find a connection with someone. Humans—even proven with scientific evidence—are creatures that need the companion of another, in whatever form that may take.
Statistics show, however, that a large number of women even in this day and age have some preference for traditional dating (not even contemporary!) rather than a hookup. Surprisingly, more than half of the male subjects also prefer this over something casual. Read more about it in this article.
So what does this say about dating and hook-up culture? Nothing substantial yet. The goal of this article is to show you stark differences between a person with intentions of hooking up only, and a person that wishes to move forward and pursue to date you.
If you’re dating wanting to know if your partner’s intention, or having a no-strings-attached agreement but curious if you two are dating-material, this one’s for you.
- Time Of Meetings
One of the biggest signs to determine the status of your almost-relationship is meeting time. Do both see each other on a week-day, having lunch? Maybe you two go to places you both agreed on and having a great time before having sex and pillow talk.
If he or she spends the night, you’d be right to think there’s more than just sex between the both of you (especially if they wake up and make breakfast!) If these accurately describe what you have with them, it’s more likely you two are dating rather than just sharing physical intimacy.
In comparison, if both of you rarely see each other during the weekdays and only catch one or the other on a Saturday night, physical intimacy is the only playing factor. There’s no reason to go out and fetch things outside the bedroom because everything you both need is within those four walls. Another factor in this situation is if both of you decide the time and place via a hookup app (check top hookup websites here). That clinches the situation between both of you as nothing more than a simple hookup.
- Quality Time?
Think back to when both of you are still chatting. Do they take the time to get to know you before asking to meet up, or do they even forgo your name and ask your address instead?
If it’s the latter, you might be in for a date. In dating, each meeting is unrushed, since both of you understand there is still the introductory phase that needs to be completed. Also, as a new date, putting your best foot forward by carefully selecting a place, time, and even dress code shows your good side.
Now, compared to dating, hookup meetings are often made an hour away from the designated time. A plan for a 9 pm “movie night” sent at 8 pm won’t grow into something more than just tangling your bodies together halfway through the supposed movie. Also, if it’s consecutive movie nights with no variations, likely, both of you are just hooking up.
- As For Things To Talk About
If it’s a hookup they want, they have no reason to go long-winded about their personal life, childhood, and dreams in life. They let the body do the talking and all the communication between both of you is a series of grunts and heated declarations with not much truth and substance. Oh, and sexual texts that are almost always sent after midnight.
As for dating, talks can be on an array of topics, from shared hobbies to personal details. Since both of you are trying to commit, you owe it to your date to include things about you and your past. It may not be as deep as one would do in a committed relationship, but the fact that communication flows in abundance between the both of you, there’s a big chance for it to grow into something more.
- Who Are You Meeting With Them?
If the answer is no one but your partner, it’s a big sign they’re only in it for the physical intimacy and there is no chance of change. Someone who doesn’t plan on committing would never introduce you to friends or family, because how will they explain the nature of your agreement? They just can’t outright tell everyone they know that you’re their casual partner. Even more, they have no solid reason to say so or otherwise.
As for dating, there’s at least a reason to introduce them, and that happens if both of you decide to become official. Even before that, you can most certainly introduce them, though your date has to agree to it first.
An article which you can read here https://www.insider.com/when-to-introduce-person-youre-dating-to-family-and-friends-2019-2, has advised us to think about it for a while before introducing your date to the family. The decision-making may be influenced by how comfortable they are with bringing someone home or how they determine if the time is right.
- Keeping Things Clear
If they have made vague notions as to the nature of your relationship with each other or made weak promises and claims, both of you are likely in a purely physical relationship and he just
doesn’t know how to tell you. Of course, unless he made it clear all he wants is physical intimacy, which is rare for anyone wanting only the external to say it right off the bat.
In contrast, dating someone at least has a bit more clarity than its counterpart. Though not officially labeled, both of you can at least talk it over without any fears and more openly than the former. Whether it be dating or hooking up, it’s only respectful to make your intentions clear so no feelings will get hurt in the process. Though not as worse as ghosting (hookups tend to end up that way though), miscommunication and leading someone on to get what you want is despicable.
- Social Media Buddies
If your date refuses to add you to any social media and prefers to continue communication in a hookup app, take it as a big sign of their intentions. Just like introducing you to their friends and family, it’s something unnecessary. They don’t see a future with you, thus not feeling compelled to add you to a site meant to connect people for a very long time.
On the other hand, if you’re dating someone (for a fair amount of time), it only makes sense to add them as a friend on Facebook or follow them on Instagram or Twitter. If both of you are social media buddies, it’s one step further into having a committed relationship. A research paper about social media and dating has stated that 17% of people post about their date on Facebook. It just means you have a shot at being official in his public accounts.
- Sex – Yay Or Nay?
Sexual life with an FWB isn’t as great as the films make it out to be. Surprise, but intimacy knowing both of you are in a loving relationship heightens and enhances the sexual experience as opposed to just doing it because they got horny. As much as hookups seem thrilling, you won’t find forbidden pleasures where yours isn’t a priority to them.